When we’re in a relationship, the subtle things we do and say can have a big impact – for better or worse. If we want to stop making someone feel insecure in a relationship we first need to take an honest look at our behavior.
While it’s true that feeling confident and secure has to come from within, it’s also true that we can unintentionally cause our partner to feel insecure when we are careless with our words or actions.
Understanding how to avoid triggering insecurities in our relationship can help us build a stronger foundation for happiness
What Causes Insecurities In Relationships?
To say exactly what causes insecurity in a relationship is impossible because everyone’s experience is different. There are, however, some common things that often factor into causing relationship insecurities.
Behaviors that can cause insecurity in a relationship include:
- Expressing an attraction to someone else
- Keeping our partner from meeting our close friends or family
- Being secretive about where we are, who we’re with or what we’re doing
- Using careless or hurtful comments about our partner’s appearance, intelligence or personality
If we find ourselves doing any of these things and we’re looking for ways to stop making someone feel insecure in a relationship – our first step is easy – STOP doing these things.
They don’t help the situation and really, they’re just not nice things to do anyway.
Of course, it’s possible that we’re dating someone who is insecure for reasons that have nothing to do with us. Dealing with relationship insecurity is challenging no matter where it stems from. The good news is, relationships with insecure people can still be successful, but they do require extra effort from both partners.
Ways to Stop Making Someone Feel Insecure in a Relationship
These 5 ways to stop making someone feel insecure in a relationship are actually good advice for building a healthy relationship in general but are particularly important if we’re making our partner feel insecure. Regardless of where our relationship insecurities stem from, practicing these tips can help.
- Be Honest & Trustworthy
Relationship insecurity is often caused when we give our partner a reason not to trust us. Lying, cheating, or keeping secrets can cause unfixable damage to our relationship. We should always be honest with our partner – and ourselves. If we find that we are keeping secrets from our partner it’s time to ask ourselves if we’re in the right relationship. Being honest and trustworthy should be easy if we’re in a healthy, loving relationship.
- Communicate Openly
Keeping the lines of communication open for our partner to share their insecurities and fears can help them become more confident and reassured. Good communication involves a lot of listening as well as an openness to exploring the things that make us feel most vulnerable. Sharing these feelings can strengthen our partnership and ease relationship insecurities
- Give Compliments
Everyone loves to hear something nice about themselves. If our partner is feeling insecure, it’s especially important to help them build their confidence by reminding them how wonderful we think they are. Let them know they’re beautiful, smart, funny – amazing. Finding ways to give our partner compliments can really make their day – but it also feels good to remind ourselves what we love about them.
- Show Gratitude
Getting into the habit of showing our appreciation and expressing thanks for the things our partner does will help them feel more secure in the relationship. Often, the longer we’ve been in a relationship, the more we get used to our partner doing things for us and we start to take for granted what we once were so grateful for. Whether it’s doing our laundry or cooking our favorite meal, we should make an effort to tell our partner we appreciate all they do.
- Go for a Walk
Ok, it doesn’t have to be a walk and forgive me if it seems out of context. Exercise has been shown to be a highly effective way to improve self-confidence. Exercise not only helps us feel better about our appearance, it also changes our body chemistry and literally makes us feel good from the inside out. It boosts endorphins and reduces stress and anxiety. Getting regular exercise with our partner can help us energize our relationship and overcome insecurities.
You Can Stop Relationship Insecurity
If our relationship is in danger but we know it’s worth saving, we should be willing to do the work necessary to save it. And there’s a silver lining to going through the challenge of solving relationship insecurity with our partner – in the end, it can create an even deeper, more meaningful connection.
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